To what do we owe greater allegiance, our outer life in the material world of human conventions, or our inner life and the requirements of soul? I explore this question through the lens of a fairy tale called “The Nixie in the Mill Pond,” collected by the Brothers Grimm.
This is a big topic and a fascinating story with many twists and turns so I’m devoting to episodes to it. This is part 1.
“ Sometimes a man stands up during supper
and walks outdoors, and keeps on walking..”
–Ranier Marie Rilke translated by Robert Bly
Transcript of Allegiance to the Inner Life: The Nixie in the Mill Pond part 1 of 2
Hello and welcome to Myth Matters an exploration at the intersection of mythology, creativity and consciousness. I’m your host Dr. Catherine Svehla. Wherever you may be in this wide beautiful crazy world of ours, I’m glad that you decided to join me here today.
To what do we owe greater allegiance, our outer life in the material world of human conventions, or our inner life and the requirements of soul? This is the topic that I want to explore today. I wonder how well we understand the relative weight and power of these worlds, how they inform and enrich the other, and what is involved in our choices?
In his poem “Sometimes a Man Stands Up During Supper Rainer Marie Rilke considers this question. He writes:
Sometimes a Man Stands Up During Supper
Sometimes a man stands up during supper
and walks outdoors, and keeps on walking,
because of a church that stands somewhere in the East.
And his children say blessings on him as if he were dead.
And another man, who remains inside his own house,
dies there, inside the dishes and in the glasses,
so that his children have to go far out into the world
toward that same church, which he forgot.
Rainer Maria Rilke, translated by Robert Bly
The poem speaks to the urgency of the inner life and the need to heed the call. According to Rilke, there is a time to set aside the concerns of ‘regular” domestic life and go meet the mystery, the source of your aliveness. Rilke suggests what can happen if you heed the call. What can happen if you don’t.
I’ve encountered people who are critical of the man who stands up. They believe that he’s chasing rainbows. Others feel that to keep on walking is an irresponsible and selfish act, an abandonment of family and home. And yet for Rilke, the demands of the inner life, the call of the soul and the quest for aliveness, is paramount. This quest has a spiritual dimension. The destination is “a church that stand somewhere in the East.” And the claims made by this call are greater than any other.
The man’s children “say blessings on him, as if he were dead,” to honor the mystery and their father’s need to belong to it, which is, Rilke suggests, a valuable gift to them. In following the call of his soul, the man who stands up frees his children to do the same.
What do you think? Is this how it works? Which is more important? The obligations and satisfactions found in family and professional life, and participation in society as it is, in the commonly accepted world? Or cultivation of the inner life and the often puzzling demands and quests urged upon us by what we call soul? This can be a difficult choice. Something is lost. Must one be sacrificed for the other, I wonder?
One final observation about Rilke’s poem. I think you can read it as a reflection on what is passed down between generations. The family inheritance often includes various forms of poverty, longings, and dreams. You can also read it as a message to the “man” inside you who might stand up, to the part of you that feels the presence of that church in this moment and is tempted to go find it. Two related perspectives that also pertain to the story that I want to tell you.
On to the story. I have a fairy tale for you that explores these choices. It’s called “The Nixie of the Mill- Pond” and was collected by the Brothers Grimm. This is a rather complex story that can be taken in a number of directions. I read it as a description of this dilemma we face, and the power of the not-lived possibilities. Because it is a complex story and a complex topic, I’ll tell you the whole story but we’ll investigate only the first half today. Anyway, that’s for later. Let’s meet the story.
I invite you to relax and listen. Let the story take you where you need to go right now. Notice what you notice. The detail or moment that captures your attention can be a great portal into what the story holds for you right now. I’m going to share my reflections on the question of allegiance to the outer or inner life but if the story lands with you in a different way, that’s okay. There is no singular meaning or moral to the story– if there is a moral in the formal sense, at all.
The Nix of the Mill Pond collected by the Brothers Grimm
There was once upon a time a miller who lived with his wife in great contentment. They had money and land, and their prosperity increased year by year more and more. But ill luck comes like a thief in the night. As their wealth had increased so did it again decrease, year by year, and at last the miller could hardly call the mill in which he lived, his own. He was in great distress, and when he lay down after his day’s work, found no rest, but tossed about in his bed, sorely troubled.
One morning he rose before daybreak and went out into the open air, thinking that perhaps there his heart might become lighter. As he was stepping over the mill-dam the first sunbeam was just breaking forth, and he heard a rippling sound in the pond. He turned round and perceived a beautiful woman, rising slowly out of the water. Her long hair, which she was holding off her shoulders with her soft hands, fell down on both sides, and covered her white body.
He soon saw that she was the nixie of the mill-pond, and in his fright did not know whether he should run away or stay where he was. But the nixie made her sweet voice heard, called him by his name, and asked him why he was so sad. The miller was at first struck dumb, but when he heard her speak so kindly, he took heart, and told her how he had formerly lived in wealth and happiness, but that now he was so poor that he did not know what to do.
Be easy, answered the nixie, I will make you richer and happier than you have ever been before, only you must promise to give me the young thing which has just been born in your house. What else can that be, thought the miller, but a puppy or a kitten, and he promised her what she desired. The nixie descended into the water again, and he hurried back to his mill, consoled and in good spirits.
He had not yet reached it, when the maid-servant came out of the house and cried to him to rejoice, for his wife had given birth to a little boy. The miller stood as if struck by lightning. He saw very well that the cunning nixie had been aware of it, and had cheated him.
Hanging his head, he went up to his wife’s bedside and when she said, why do you not rejoice over the fine boy, he told her what had befallen him, and what kind of a promise he had given to the nixie. Of what use to me are riches and prosperity, he added, if I am to lose my child. But what can I do. Even the relatives, who had come there to wish them joy, did not know what to say.
In the meantime prosperity again returned to the miller’s house. All that he undertook succeeded. It was as if presses and coffers filled themselves of their own accord, and as if money multiplied nightly in the cupboards. It was not long before his wealth was greater than it had ever been before.
But he could not rejoice over it untroubled, for the bargain which he had made with the nixie tormented his soul. Whenever he passed the mill-pond, he feared she might ascend and remind him of his debt. He never let the boy himself go near the water. Beware, he said to him, if you do but touch the water, a hand will rise, seize you, and draw you down.
But as year after year went by and the nixie did not show herself again, the miller began to feel at ease. The boy grew up to be a youth and was apprenticed to a huntsman. When he had learnt everything, and had become an excellent huntsman, the lord of the village took him into his service.
In the village lived a beautiful and true-hearted maiden, who pleased the huntsman, and when his master perceived that, he gave him a little house, the two were married, lived peacefully and happily, and loved each other with all their hearts.
One day the huntsman was chasing a roe (a type of small deer). And when the animal turned aside from the forest into the open country, he pursued it and at last shot it. He did not notice that he was now in the neighborhood of the dangerous mill-pond, and after he had disemboweled the roe, he went to the water to wash his blood-stained hands.
He had scarcely dipped them in when the nixie ascended. Smiling, she wound her dripping arms around him and drew him quickly down under the waves which closed over him.
When it was evening and the huntsman did not return home, his wife became alarmed. She went out to seek him, and as he had often told her that he had to be on his guard against the snares of the nixie and the mill-pond, she already suspected what had happened. She hurried to the water and when she found his hunting-pouch lying on the shore, she could no longer have any doubt of the misfortune. Lamenting her sorrow, and wringing her hands she called on her beloved by name, but in vain.
She hurried across to the other side of the pond, and called him anew. She reviled the nixie with harsh words, but no answer greeted her. The surface of the water remained calm. Only the crescent moon stared steadily back at her. The poor woman did not leave the pond. With hasty steps she paced round and round it without resting a moment. Sometimes in silence. Sometimes uttering a loud cry. Sometimes sobbing softly.
At last, her strength came to an end. She sank down to the ground and fell into a heavy sleep. Presently a dream took possession of her. She was anxiously climbing upwards between great masses of rock. Thorns and briars caught her feet, the rain beat in her face, and the wind tossed her long hair about.
When she had reached the summit, quite a different sight presented itself to her. The sky was blue, the air soft. The ground sloped gently downwards and on a green meadow, gay with flowers of every color, stood a pretty cottage. She went up to it and opened the door. There sat an old woman with white hair, who beckoned to her kindly.
At that very moment, the poor woman awoke, day had already dawned, and she at once resolved to act in accordance with her dream. She laboriously climbed the mountain. Everything was exactly as she had seen it in the night. The old woman received her kindly,
and pointed out a chair on which she might sit. You must have met with a misfortune, she said, since you have sought out my lonely cottage.
With tears, the woman related what had befallen her. Be comforted, said the old woman, I will help you. Here is a golden comb for you. Wait till the full moon has risen, then go to the mill-pond, seat yourself on the shore, and comb your long black hair with this comb. When you have done, lay it down on the bank, and you will see what will happen.
The woman returned home, but the time till the full moon came, passed slowly. When at last the shining disc appeared in the heavens, she went out to the mill-pond, sat down and combed her long black hair with the golden comb. When she had finished, she laid it down at the water’s edge. It was not long before there was a movement in the depths. A wave rose, rolled to the shore, and bore the comb away with it.
In not more than the time necessary for the comb to sink to the bottom, the surface of the water parted, and the head of the huntsman arose. He did not speak but looked at his wife with sorrowful glances. At the same instant, a second wave came rushing up and covered the man’s head. All had vanished, the mill-pond lay peaceful as before, and nothing but the face of the full moon shone on it.
Full of sorrow, the woman went back but again the dream showed her the cottage of the old woman. Next morning, she again set out and complained of her woes to the wise woman. The old woman gave her a golden flute and said, wait till the full moon comes again, then take this flute. Play a beautiful air on it and when you have finished, lay it on the sand. Then you will see what will happen.
The wife did as the old woman told her. No sooner was the flute lying on the sand than there was a stirring in the depths, and a wave rushed up and bore the flute away with it. Immediately afterwards the water parted and not only the head of the man, but half of his body also arose. He stretched out his arms longingly towards the shore but a second wave came up, covered him, and drew him down again.
Alas, what does it help me, said the unhappy woman, that I should see my beloved, only to lose him again. Despair filled her heart anew but the dream led her a third time to the house of the old woman. She set out and the wise woman gave her a golden spinning-wheel, consoled her and said, all is not yet fulfilled. Wait until the time of the full moon then take the spinning wheel, seat yourself on the shore, and spin the spool full. When you have done that, place the spinning-wheel near the water, and you will see what will happen.
The woman obeyed all she said exactly. As soon as the full moon showed itself, she carried the golden spinning-wheel to the shore and span industriously until the flax came to an end and the spool was quite filled with the threads. No sooner was the wheel standing on the shore than there was a more violent movement than before in the depths of the pond and a mighty wave rushed up and bore the wheel away with it.
Immediately the head and the whole body of the man rose into the air, in a water-spout. He quickly sprang to the shore, caught his wife by the hand and fled.
But they had gotten only a very little distance when the whole pond rose with a frightful roar and streamed out over the open country. The fugitives saw death before their eyes. In her terror, the woman implored the help of the old woman and in an instant they were transformed, she into a toad, he into a frog. The flood which had overtaken them could not destroy them, but it tore them apart and carried them far away.
When the water had dispersed and they both touched dry land again, they regained their human form. But neither knew where the other was. They found themselves among strange people, who did not know their native land. High mountains and deep valleys lay between them. They were both obliged to tend sheep for a livelihood and for many long years they drove their flocks through field and forest, unknown to the other and full of sorrow and longing.
Early one spring, they both went out one day with their flocks. As chance would have it, they drew near each other. They met in a valley but did not recognize each other. Still, they rejoiced at having company. Now they drove their flocks to the same place each day. They did not speak much but they felt comforted.
One evening, when the full moon was shining in the sky and the sheep were already at rest, the shepherd pulled the flute out of his pocket and played a beautiful but sorrowful air. When he finished he saw that the shepherdess was weeping bitterly. Why are you weeping, he asked. Alas, she answered, under another full moon I played this air on the flute for the last time, and the head of my beloved rose out of the water.
He looked at her and it seemed as if a veil fell from his eyes, and he recognized his dear wife, and when she looked at him and the moon shone in his face she knew him also. They embraced and kissed each other, and no one need ask if they were happy.
This story has a number of twists and turns. Who is the protagonist, the central character? First we are with the miller and his dilemma. Then our attention shifts to the son who becomes a huntsman and gets married. Then the wife, her dream, and what she does to save her husband. And finally, the fate of the man and the woman and their happy reunion as a married couple.
Like Rilke’s poem, the story invites us to reflect on the action through time and generations and to consider the connections, and also to locate the characters and their choices in our individual psychic community as it exists right now. The characters and events in the fairy tale, as symbols and metaphors, can describe happenings in the outer or inner worlds of experiences. Perhaps reveal dimensions of their relationship.
First, a brief summary of the action. A state of stable material prosperity has come to an end. The miller is distraught. The nixie in his millpond offers to restore his material security in exchange for the new life in his household, and he unwittingly bargains away his newborn son. He’s deeply disturbed by this but it’s too late to undo. Still, years go by and the nixie doesn’t reappear and the son stays away from the water.
Until one day when he has grown and become a huntsman in service to the lord of the village. he pursues a roe, that is a small deer, to the pond. he kills it and unthinking, washes his hands in the water and is taken by the nixie. He doesn’t come home. His worried wife quickly figures out what has happened and she begins a process under the guidance of an old woman who first appears to her in a dream– that is, a message from the unconscious– to save her husband and be reunited with him.
This is not the end of the story but I’m going to stop here. Our exploration will be more manageable if we consider our fairy tale up to the point that the huntsman is taken today, and pick up with the woman’s quest in the next episode. So, be sure to tune in for part two!
Let’s look at the story with our questions about allegiance to the outer and inner worlds in mind. Our fairy tale reminds me of a couple of other stories, the Greek myth of Psyche and Eros, and the Norwegian fairy tale of Valemon the White Bear King. I’ll post links to episodes in which I tell those stories but for now, these stories come to mind because they can also be interpretated as stories about the dynamic relationship between the unconscious and the conscious ego, the soul’s call to greater consciousness or creativite power, and the loss and dissolution that occurs when you take the first steps in answer to the soul imperative.
The move toward greater consciousness precipitates a break-up of the marriage, the metaphor of stable unity in these stories. Aspects of the conscious personality, the husband and the wife, so to speak, are separated and must be reunited but at a different level of consciousness. This is the psychic process.
In our story, the possibility of greater consciousness, represented as a new life in the household, is traded away for maintenance of the outer life, material wealth. This restoration is incomplete because the bargain is known and makes everyone uneasy. There is a long waiting period, years of wondering if and when the nixie will reappear. Over time the unease fades, as it does. We allow ourselves to forget and yet ultimately the son, now a huntsman and married, capitulates to the energy of that earlier call.
He “forgets” where he is; he is unaware– as was his miller father, right? I mean, the miller didn’t know that his wife was giving birth while he was talking to the nixie at the mill pond. And the huntsman is taken into the pond by the nixie. What he represents falls into the unconscious, is captured by a complex in the terminology of Jungian psychology. The possibilities, the new life, are repressed. Unlived possibilities that are not entertained can be destructive forces in the psyche. They can take malevolent forms. There are consequences.
As in the other stories I mentioned, the psychic process to retrieve the huntsman aspect of the personality and to reunite or integrate it, to restore the marriage but at a new level of consciousness, is undertaken by the woman. The loving wife and her quest take center stage in the story.
In the European and ancient Greek tradition of this fairy tale, the relational aspect of the personality, the feeling and soul component, is imagined as female. “Psyche,” the ancient Greek word for “soul,” is personified as a woman. Jungian psychology builds on this with the notion of soul as anima and as “the feminine.”
I’ll say more about the actions of the woman and this part of the process in the next episode. Today we can dig a bit deeper into the opening situation by looking at the characters in the story. In the first half of the story we have the Miller, the Nixie in the mill pond, and the huntsman.
The Miller in fairy tales is an ambivalent character. In her work with fairy tales, Marie Louise von Franz notes that the miller doesn’t really do much hard work because he has the water turning the mill works for him. The language of the story suggests that his prosperity and later poor fortune are a matter of luck, or some dynamic other than his effort and hard work.
At the same time, the invention of the water mill is ingenious, clever, creative. You can admire or look down on the miller, depending on your values and point of view. This ambiguity leaves the door open to dishonesty. The miller isn’t on quite the same footing as his fellow peasants who farm long hours and he’s in a position of power as they depend on access to his mill. He can also rationalize and be dishonest with himself about his motivations.
Our miller makes a bad bargain and I have the sense that he’s not a bad man– he deeply regrets his action when he understands it– and yet he’s not such a great guy either and not very attentive to the life around him. How could he confuse the birth of a son with a new litter of kittens or pups? Something is on autopilot and too narrowly focused.
Let’s consider his adversary, the nixie or water spirit who lives in his millpond. Nixies look like humans but often have a mermaid-like tail.s Figures like this are found in many mythological traditions. In Greek mythology, a Naiad is a type of Nymph (female nature spirit) who protects lakes and streams. In Celtic legends you find the Melusine. In some traditions, Norwegian myth, for example, there are male water spirits.
These beings personify the uncanny in nature, that is in the natural world and our psychic nature. They don’t always bring trouble to the human world but are best known for their powers of seduction and attempts lure humans into their world by drowning them or by stealing children or bargaining for them.
What is the nixie’s motivation? She could be evil. She could be a destructive force. She could be driven by envy, loneliness, or curiosity. She is from another world, the world under the water. Isn’t this an enduring mystery? We do not understand the depths and what lives there and yet water is the source of life.
Bodies of water offer themselves as potent metaphors for the mystery, hidden worlds, depths, and in Jungian terms, the unconscious. The watery world a huge place where we can’t live, and although we can take a drink or a cup or a bucket from it, we can never drain the waters of the world or plumb the depths of it. The same can be said of the unconscious. And we are most familiar with the surface and what we see reflected there.
The Miller doesn’t realize a basic truth that bridges the outer world and the unseen world, here presented as the depths of the mill pond– and that is, that things are not always what they seem. The surface appearance isn’t all. He took the Nixie at face value. he was seduced by her sympathy and kind voice and beauty and didn’t stop to consider her nature and possible motivations or his full situation. Or his own motivations. A seemingly easy solution presented itself, he was deceived, and there is the dishonesty and ambivalence.
When the nixie, the energy or complex emerged from the unconscious, his character and lack of commitment to the new life were revealed. Boom. And now this repression is carried forward.
Let’s pause here for a moment. There’s a lot to consider and I want to tell you about a cool opportunity that I’m offering later this fall. Then we’ll come back to our last character, the huntsman.
I’m super psyched to tell you about my online story course, or rather story work experience, Step Into the Fairy Glen. We spend two weeks, the days from new moon to full moon, working one of my favorite stories together. It begins with the new moon on Friday November 1st and ends on the full moon November 15th.
This is an opportunity to gather insight into your current life direction, to experiment in a story with the power of story, and to learn some useful approaches to story and in the inner life. What C.G. Jung called the “symbolic life” and I often call the soul life.
This November will be an excellent time to make a fairy glen journey. We’ll be in harrmony with the seasonal rhythms and if you’re attentive to astrology, current transits of the transpersonal planets: Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto add special impetus. You may be feeling this. I recently realized that Step Into the Fairy Glen will end at the same time that Pluto leaves Capricorn for good (well, for the next 200+ years) to move into Aquarius, the sign of humanitarian concerns, innovation, community, technology, and emphasis on the role that we play in the world.
So, if the nature of your work in the world or your life direction is up for review right now, Step Into the Fairy Glen could be very helpful in clarifying the questions, values, or obstacles. And if you already have a good set of practices that feed your soul, or are a coach or teacher who uses story to help others, Step Into the Fairy Glen could be a wonderful refresher or source of new tools as we enter this new paradigm.
Investigate the details of Step Into the Fairy Glen if it sounds interesting. The link to information and registration is posted with the transcript to this episode and on the Mythic Mojo website.
A big welcome to new email subscribers: Sue, Barbara, Dorothy, Melissa, Luke, Tim, Sigma, and Jan. Welcome! If you would like to receive links to new Myth Matters episodes in your inbox, head over the Mythic Mojo website and sign up.
I want to give a shout out to long time patreon patrons and bandcamp supporters Amy, Cynthia, and Rags. I’m so grateful for your consistency and all that you send my way– which is more than dollars, as you know to me.
Now, what of our huntsman? The son is kept away from the water, he is warned about the danger that his father the miller has bequeathed him, and he grows up to become a huntsman. A huntsman goes out looking for prey, something to kill, that is grasp, with a combination of intent and openness.
The huntsman is one who wants to know. The miller traded away the opportunity with only a moment’s reflection but the hunter is a different type of consciousness.
Our huntsman has achieved some success in the world. He has skill and he’s rewarded by the lord of the village and has a home and a happy marriage. He has a good situation in the outer material world. Because he is a hunter, the precipitating event takes place in the course of a chase.
Like his father, he is narrowly focused and unaware in the crucial moment and yet circumstances have changed. The original bargain has been completed as he has been drawn into the water by the nixie. But there is more to the story. There is his wife, the woman.
The presence of phases and stages in this fairy tale is one thing that I appreciate about it. We rarely wrap up our encounters with unconscious material in one fell swoop or complete transformative processes in a straightforward fashion, without twists and turns and setbacks. I think this relevant if you read the story as a metaphor for the relationships and actions of different aspects of your personality or as a psychological task or trauma handed across generations, or both.
I’ll hope you join me for the next episode and our exploration of the rest of this story. Feel free to contact me and let me know what this story sparked for you. It’s a way of solidifying the story for yourself and I always enjoy hearing from you and learn a lot from your response.
If we have a better understanding of our need for myth, and all that our old stories offer, we can live more satisfying lives. We can inhabit a better story and create a more beautiful, just and sustainable world.
And that’s it for me, Catherine Svehla and Myth Matters. Thank you so much for listening. Take good care of yourself and until next time, keep the mystery in your life alive.
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