“Loving is an authentic psychological task, the most demanding there is, just because it activates in us new ways of knowing ourselves.’” — Aldo Carotenuto
The myth of Eros and Psyche can be read as a myth of initiation orchestrated by the goddess Aphrodite, a personification (or archetype) of love, sexuality, and beauty as enlivening powers that bring us into relationship with someone or something in particular.
The story tells us something about the demands of this type of love, and what is required to express and live it.
It also offers an opportunity to reflect on the transpersonal energies and patterns that shape human life and comprise our destiny.
Transcript of Psyche and Eros: Our Initiation through Aphrodite
Hello, and welcome to Myth Matters, storytelling and conversation about mythology and what myth can offer us today. I’m your host and personal mythologist Dr. Catherine Svehla. Wherever you may be in this wide, beautiful, crazy world of ours, you are part of this story circle.
Now, I don’t usually do programs that need to be listened to sequentially and I think that if you’re coming to this episode without having listened to the last one, which was the telling of the Greek myth of Psyche and Eros, that you could probably stay here and then go and listen to the story. But whichever way you do it, you are going to want to listen to the episode Psyche and Eros, so that you have the story. What I’m going to say today will make a little bit more sense and you also will have the opportunity to add your response to the story into your own reflections and experience, and that matters.
What I want to do today is unpack this Greek myth a little bit. In brief, I think we have a story here about the union of Eros and Psyche– and it’s a process. It’s not something that goes immediately to the happy ever after!~ Eros, the god Eros, is the son of Aphrodite and conceptually, he’s the incarnating life principle. He’s what brings things together. He’s what brings spirit and matter together. You can think of Eros as holy desire, the glue of the universe or the cosmos.
And then we have Psyche, who in the story is a mortal woman, and conceptually, she is soul. Psyche is the Greek word for “soul.” She is a mediating energy of imagination and feeling.
So, the purpose of these two coming together, the cosmic manifestation of desire and the mortal energies of imagination and feeling, is to create new life. The archetypal background of this story is answering the call of the Self. It’s about realizing yourself through contact with the transpersonal.
The transpersonal in this story is the goddess Aphrodite, the personification or the archetype of love, beauty, relatedness, sexuality. And this Aphroditic love is love for the particular, for a specific other. It’s not agape, it’s not universal love. Aphrodite is about the love and devotion that comes from attention to one in particular, and seeing the beauty in that one.
Each of us has a relationship to Aphrodite. It may not be as intense and close as Psyche’s relationship to Aphrodite or Eros’s relationship to Aphrodite in this Greek myth, and yet when we talk about myth being alive, and we talk about living myth, what we’re talking about is inhabiting the patterns in our old stories, and those patterns are animated by the archetypes. Although you may have a stronger relationship to one or the other, and this is what those books like “find the god or goddess within” are all about, Aphrodite is part of your life.
I believe that what Aphrodite represents is particularly important to all of us today because she is about loving and finding the beauty in the particular. And I wonder, is there anything more powerful than our aesthetic response to the Other and to the world, to inspire love? To inspire the kind of love that we need, the kind of love that makes the world go round as they say, and the kind of love that precedes any real morality, or moral action?
I believe that Aphrodite has a great deal to offer us today and I want to approach this story of Psyche and Eros as an initiation, as an apprenticeship to Aphrodite. I think this is useful because we all have a relationship to Aphrodite. I also wonder if the contours of this story might not tell us something about apprenticeship to other archetypes, and to the experience of being initiated into a deeper and fuller sense of self.
There’s one more piece I want to throw into the mix here before I turn to the story, and that is a book by James Hillman called The Soul’s Code. In The Soul’s Code, Hillman examines theories from the ancient Greeks and Romans and the Neo-Platonists, about the relationship between an individual life and archetypes, or daimons, that is the personal spirit, or genius that represents your calling and your connection to fate. It’s an interesting book, and I mention it here because initiation is an important part of that relationship.
When you see yourself as being initiated through challenges, into a relationship with the transpersonal, that is the meaning of your life, you can make the move from being a victim of life’s difficulties, to the recipient of a destiny.
In his gorgeous poem “The Man Watching,” Ranier Maria Rilke invokes the metaphor of the angel who came to wrestle with the prophets in the Old Testament. He writes,
“Whoever was beaten by this Angel
(who often simply declined the fight)
went away proud and strengthened
and great, from that harsh hand
that kneaded him as if to change his shape.
Winning does not tempt that man.
This is how he grows: by being defeated, decisively
by constantly greater beings.”
Those are the words my friend ,of someone who understands that life brings out our greatness through difficulty. And now with that long prelude, let’s talk about the story.
When the Greek myth of Psyche and Eros begins, we have Psyche who is a young woman of extraordinary beauty. She’s so beautiful that she is compared to the goddess Aphrodite. So, there we have a clue about the archetype of her initiation. She’s so beautiful that she’s compared to Aphrodite. And also, she’s so beautiful that she’s admired by everyone. But she’s also lonely because there are no men who are willing to approach her. They’re all intimidated.
This great beauty, this great gift, presents itself as both a blessing and a curse. Now, I think that many of us have the experience at some point, often beginning in childhood, of being too much of something, or being told that we are too much of something. And what we do with this too muchness, whether we repress it or express it, whether we experience it as blessing or curse, whether we find the way to bring those two things together, is one of the riddles in our lives. It’s part of initiation.
In Psyche’s case, she ends up on a mountaintop, abandoned, waiting for her husband, whoever or whatever that might be. It ends up being the god Eros. He comes and rescues her. And the two of them live together for a while in something that seems perfect. But it is deeply unconscious.
For one thing, it doesn’t change. It’s happening in an immortal realm. And the thing about immortal realms, however much we dread aging and our mortal fate, is that things don’t have much value because there is no consequence. And they’re kind of dull because not much changes. They’re living in this beautiful, unchanging environment that’s going to get stagnant. And we have the ultimate clue to this unconscious state which is that she doesn’t see Eros. He comes to her at night. The most important part of her life is happening in the metaphorical dark.
When she finds out that she’s pregnant, when she finds out that her life can change, that she’s going to bring something new into the world, then she wants to see her sisters. Her sisters come to visit and their envy touches on Psyche’s own doubt about this husband that she never sees. And she lights a light and she sees him and that in a sense, ruins everything. And it also gets everything going. So, we see here that what catalyzes our action doesn’t necessarily have to be a great thing. It doesn’t necessarily have to be everyone around us going “rah rah rah,” to get us to listen to that voice inside that says things need to change.
And if you’re wondering what can prevent us from hearing that voice? Well, it’s often the ideas that we have about where useful information can be found. Our ideas or prejudices about the nature of our self and our inner life can make us deaf to the inner voices. In The Soul’s Code Hillman writes,
“We have to notice our own deafness, the obstructions that make us hard of hearing: the reductionism the literalism, the scientism of our so-called common sense. For it is hard to get it through our hard heads that there can be messages from elsewhere, more important to the conduct of our lives than what comes through Centel and Internet. Meanings that don’t slide in fast, free and easy, but are encoded particularly in the painful, pathologized events that perhaps are the only ways the gods can wake us up.”
In other words, we have to be tuned into our inner life and inner reality, to hear our own call to wake up. Psyche disobeys Eros. She seems to follow bad advice from the sisters when she lights the light and looks at him. But when she sees him, she truly falls in love with him because now she really knows who she’s dealing with. And of course, everything falls apart. He leaves and she is left alone and bereft and wandering. It is in this state that she finally goes to confront the goddess Aphrodite, who has been waiting for her, and has been the key to her initiation all along.
Aphrodite gives Psyche a series of tasks. All of them are impossible. Psyche correctly understands the impossibility and she weeps. She surrenders to the situation. In the ancient Greek the words for weeping and for bowing and praying are etymologically connected. She surrenders and helpers appear. Helpers appear because this initiation is her destiny,
The tasks that she has to perform tell us something about process. And I do think that these tasks and the process have a unique meaning in the context of Aphrodite, and what she represents for us. But I also suspect that they are transferable in various forms to some other archetypes, that is some other personifications of forces in life that initiate us into our destinies.
The first task is the task of sorting various seeds. One way to understand this task is that it’s developing discernment, the ability to recognize what belongs together, and we noticed that these are seeds so, you have to look carefully. Seeds are also possibilities. You have to be able to look very closely at all of the possibilities and options and recognize what belongs together in order to make choices.
The second task is the collection of some of the golden wool from the solar powered rams. And these are very dangerous animals. We know that Psyche was feeling like the only way to get the wool was to just go up to the rams and probably be trampled to death. But what she learns is that there is right timing. Right timing, that there is a good time, the best time to approach the rams. And she also learned something about right effort. She doesn’t have to take the wool from the body of the rams, she can merely collect the wool that has been caught on all of the bushes they’ve been walking through. So, there’s a lesson here about right timing and right effort, that you don’t have to make the sacrifice of. self that you imagine, if you understand right timing and right effort.
The third task is to go and collect a flask of water from the river Styxs. To go and dip into depth. In other words, to dip into the underlying river of water and life that is often imagined to be the unconscious. Here the lesson is that you need it, but you can only take a little. As human beings we can only bear a little bit of contact with the immense powers of the mystery.
In the fourth task, Psyche is sent right into the heart of that mystery, isn’t she? When she’s told to go down to the underworld and ask Persephone for some of her beauty. Psyche receives some advice from a tower. This tower tells her, in essence, ignore the pleas from others who have gone before you, from those who are already dead, and stay focused on your goal. Stay focused on your goal, act for yourself. She’s also told not to make herself comfortable in the underworld. In other words, again, don’t forget that you are alive.
Now there’s another twist in the story isn’t there, because once she gets the box of beauty from Persephone and makes her way back up to the top, well, Psyche seems to make yet another mistake because she opens the box. But I think the opening of the box reminds us that she’s not making this journey alone. We have been following the process of her initiation and yet she has a partner in the form of Eros. And I think it’s really beautiful that we are reminded at the end of the story that he has also been transformed through her activity, and what might be happening off screen. And it’s his turn to come and wake her.
She wakes him up with the light and they separate. He comes and wakes her up, and they come back together.
Now we remember that Psyche had helpers throughout, and those particular helpers provide us with some clues, perhaps something to meditate on in terms of the qualities that are required to pass this initiation. The ants, little creatures of the earth, are tiny and they’re working together, look what they accomplish. And they are able to see up close, and they understand the nature of seeds.
The reeds, the reeds are responsive to the water, to the wind, to the soil. Is it this responsiveness I wonder, that gives them the wisdom of right timing and right approach? The eagle who swoops in to grab the flask has vision, the ability to see what is important and zoom right in on it. And then we have the tower, a symbol of human culture, which I think really symbolizes the difference between the world that we inhabit, with our mortality and our human limitations and gifts, and the mysteries that are beyond us.
Having become acquainted with these qualities, having completed these tasks, then Psyche is suitable in the eyes of Aphrodite and she and Eros are married. Her initiation is complete.
So, those are some of my thoughts about this story and I hope they help you unpack it and perhaps locate this pattern in your own life. I’ve by no means exhausted this story and if the moment that you found listening to it in the last episode feels like it takes you in a completely different direction, then certainly follow it. If you have questions about your moment in the story, feel free to contact me. I would be happy to help you unpack that further.
I do have a poem for you before we part ways, but first, I want to give a big welcome to new subscribers Jim, Kerry, and David. Welcome!
If you’re new to Myth Matters, I invite you to head over to the Mythic Mojo website, where you can subscribe to the email list, read a transcript of this episode, and find information my other offerings, like Step Into the Fairy Glen.
And you might be asking, what is Step Into the Fairy Glen?
Step into the Fairy Glen is my two -week, self-guided, online course in working with story to tap into your symbolic life. If you are feeling called to change ,if you are feeling out of touch with your inner life, or if you would like to deepen that connection, Step Into the Fairy Glen is a very interesting process that revolves around a story I deeply love. For 10 or 15 minutes a day over the course of two weeks, well, you’d be pretty amazed at what can happen.
On the website, you’ll also find the link to Myth Matters on Patreon. I am very grateful for the patrons and supporters of this podcast– thank you to longtime patrons Belinda, Trish, Micael, and Paul. Thank you so much, my friends.
Now in closing, a poem by Robin van Löben Sels titled “Genesis.”
“Together we begin alone.
We are the sources of our dreams.
We learn of time by living
in times remembering stream.
Caught in long delight, we muse
over our own reflection.
When the dry bed cracks like a map, we fall,
each in her own direction.
Time is the element we shared,
time, and the luminous fantasy
of exile. Now our wandering minds
must seek loves sanctuary.
We gather scars. Somehow we grow
with loss. We root like trees.
If we can simplify our lives
then we may come to see
the winding spirits dance with flesh,
defining metaphor.
And move again. And move as we
have never moved before.
Things are so seldom what they seem.
The mind’s eye moves by night.
A desert opens onto God.
Sing light. Sing light. Sing light.”
That was the poem “Genesis” by Robin van Löben Sels.
If we have a better understanding of our need for myth and all that our old stories offer, we can live more satisfying lives. We can inhabit a better story and create a more beautiful, just and sustainable world.
And that’s it for me, Catherine Svehla and Myth Matters. Thank you so much for listening. Take good care of yourself, and until next time, keep the mystery in your life alive.
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